Resistance and procrastination: Ways
to identify and overcome these goal stealers
Everyone finds at certain times that they just can’t move forward,
they are stuck...has this ever happened to you? It may mean that
you need to reformulate your goals. It might be helpful to go back
to brainstorming or other goal setting basics. This can also be a
sign that it’s time to get creative and find other more enjoyable
ways to get where you want to go. Getting help from others can be
particularly useful at these times.
Internal roadblocks that keep you from advancing towards your goal
can stem from temporary lack of focus or fear. Outside
distractions like too much partying, TV or computer games can also
stop your forward momentum. Some people distract themselves with
extra long “to do” lists of unimportant tasks that take up time
that might be better spent focusing on high priority items.
However, resistance and procrastination may be a sign of distress
stemming from deeply held programming or blockages from childhood.
Another possibility is that you may have a deep-seated fear of
success and the responsibilities that come with it, or you may
fear failure so much that you don’t even try anything. When you
encounter obstacles such as these, it is useful to get support
from a therapist or other professional. A professional can help
you explore your internal motivation so that you can release what
gets in the way of your creating a life you love to live.
53. List obstacles in your journal:
Writing down both inner and outer obstacles to reaching your goals
can help you to become more aware of what is getting in your way.
And it can help you overcome them. Often just being conscious of
the difficulties helps you to find creative solutions.
For example, your goal may be to develop a successful business
that nets you one million dollars in 3 years. Examples of external
obstacles you might face in reaching this goal could be; recent
challenges in getting a bank loan; a lot of competition in your
type of business; or family members who are unsupportive or
negative about your idea. Inner obstacles might be: your own
belief system, that says; “you will never succeed with your own
business”; a belief that you don’t really deserve what you want;
or fear of failure.
Writing such obstacles down takes them out of
your head and puts them on paper where you can get a helpful
degree of objectivity.
54. What are the payoffs for not reaching your goal?
One payoff for
not reaching your goal may reflect a part of you that says; “I
don’t want to change. Attaining this goal will force me to become
a new person and I’ll have to move out of my comfort zone”. Or,
“reaching this goal might put me in a position of power and I
don’t like giving orders, directions or commands”. It might also
be that, “reaching this goal will require me to have to work much
harder than I do now, I may have to take risks or do things I’ve
always been afraid of.”
You might become so successful that you could lose friends. So
another payoff for not reaching your goal is to keep your present
friends. Yet another payoff for not reaching your goals or having
“problems” is that you get to play victim and have people feel
sorry for you. You may get extra attention for having a problem.
It’s human nature to want to keep the status quo of comfort and
55. Ways to release negative feelings:
In your Goals Journal, write
down anything negative that comes into your mind. Keep writing
until you have a sense of completion. If you find that the
negative feelings you face repeat over and over like an obsession,
consider getting professional help.
56. Explore inner and outer conflicts:
When you start losing energy or passion for your goals, explore
any conflicts you uncover. Ask questions in your journal with your
dominant hand and answer with the non-dominant hand. See if this
helps bring clarity into the issue you’re facing. You can also use
your Goals Support Group to help you understand your motivations.
Sometimes you may have a conflict with another person that is
somehow impeding your progress, at other times you actually have a
conflict inside yourself. You may find that the answer is simple
and only requires tools that you will find here or…you may find
that you need professional help.
57. Take action on things you’ve been putting off:
Make a list of
all the important things you’ve been putting off and start doing
them. These things may not necessarily be directly related to your
goal. Put them on your “to do” list. Denis Waitley, a well-known
success trainer, says that he writes down the five most important
tasks that he has put off for the last month and then makes sure
to take steps towards finishing them. You break out of being stuck
by doing and taking action. Willingness to take action creates the
energy to do something. This is an extremely powerful technique
that will really help remove resistances and catapult you ahead!
58. Find your “problem areas” that may be holding you back:
concept of “problem areas” is that you may have a weakness in a
certain area or a lack of skill which holds you back in other
parts of your life. For instance, a salesperson tells the story of
being reasonably successful but hating cold calling and
prospecting. Once he made the commitment to focus and overcome the
resistance and fear he had about taking action, his sales career
really took off. Not doing this was holding him back even though
he was quite successful in his other work activities. Figure out
what your “problem areas” are that may be holding you back in your
desire to reach your goals. Start taking action on them today!
Continue to 77 Goal Setting Tips 59-67 Releasing Attachment to